


The Death Knell of a Heart

by melimarron



Series: At the End of the World, Who Will Bring Your Grave Flowers? [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, I am so sorry, tony contemplates death just before snapping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-07
Updated: 2020-03-07
Packaged: 2021-02-23 12:54:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23045239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melimarron/pseuds/melimarron
Summary: Tony Stark contemplates what his life was, as he makes his way across the battlefield towards Thanos.
Relationships: Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe) & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark
Series: At the End of the World, Who Will Bring Your Grave Flowers? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1656145
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	The Death Knell of a Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Very minor Far From Home spoilers ahead!

Doctor Strange lifts a finger, and Tony Stark knows what it means.

It’s funny- the battlefield is bloody, and noisy, and chaotic, and there’s no way that Tony Stark, one of the only unpowered men on the field who the Mad Titan is gunning for, should be able to see it in the insanity of the fight.

But he does.

His heart thumps in his chest. God, his heart. That old thing was supposed to give out years ago. It sounds like a death knell. Like his heart understood before his brain what that raised finger meant.

His first reaction, is of horror, of course. _No, no, no, no, I carved out a life for myself against all odds, and I am going to keep it!_

A voice that sounds a little like Steve immediately rebukes him for that thought. _Not against all odds. I hid. I made myself a paradise while Natasha kept things going._

_This isn’t fair! This isn’t fair!_

Tony clenched his hands into fists and stared at Pepper across the battlefield. God, she was beautiful.

_It wasn’t supposed to end like this. I was supposed to be there for Morgan. I was supposed to fix everything so that she could grow up in a safe world, with me there to guide her. I was supposed to be a part of her life!_

He remembered daydreaming about being a role model for Morgan, when she was a baby. She was supposed to be his partner. He was supposed to be the guy who helped her, who helped her achieve everything he _knew_ she could do. She was supposed to grow up with a _father_!

_Isn’t there anyone else who could do it?_

Fourteen million timelines.

_No, no, no, no, no._

Tony shudders in his suit. “No,” he manages to get out, fear making his voice raspy. “No, no, no-”

_It has to be done._

“No, no, no, no, I was doing so much better, no, no, no, no, _not now!_ ”

He’s fighting, now, swept along into the fray. He’s Tony goddamn Stark; he can have a mental breakdown over his own impending doom while fighting off Thanos’ army.

_I can’t- I can’t-_

Nausea attacks his stomach almost as viciously as Nameless Thanos Goon No. 89. _I can’t do it. Please, Strange, don’t make me do it._

But Strange is long gone, off fighting somewhere else, waiting for Tony to make the move that will save the universe.

God. Save the universe. When put like that, what’s one life?

He’d once tried to die for New York, hadn’t he?

_I didn’t have Morgan then._

There was a movie he’d seen once. He couldn’t remember the title, but he did remember one scene from it. How did that line go? _Survival instinct becomes different when you have kids. The last thing you see when you’ll die is their faces because your brain is trying to make you live for their sake._

Something like that.

_Oh, God. I’m so sorry, Morgan._

_I love you._

Tony Stark closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and starts making his way towards Thanos.

\---

He doesn’t know if this will work.

Maybe it won’t.

Thanos is from an entirely different time. These Stones are, technically, poached from different universes.

Maybe this- their last-ditch effort- will be useless.

What will they do then?

Tony Stark is a genius. He isn’t used to being uncertain. Isn’t used to being the guy asking questions. But right here, right now, running to get to Thanos as fast as his old body will allow, Tony Stark has too many questions to ever be answered.

Will Pepper be okay?

Will Morgan be okay?

Will Happy be okay?

Will the rest of the team be okay?

Will Peter get EDITH?

Will they remember him?

Will they remember Natasha?

Will they remember everyone who’s died today?

He just _doesn’t know_ , and that drives him insane.

Tony Stark was an excellent gambler. The night before being kidnapped by the Ten Rings, he’d been gambling. He _knows_ gambling.

These are not good odds.

But you don’t need to have the numbers on your side in order to win.

Tony Stark stares Thanos in the eyes. _I am inevitable._

Tony wants to scoff, wants to smile, wants to laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh, because here they are, two fathers who have lost their daughters, and yet one of them is willing to do anything to protect her, while the other is willing to do anything to further his own goals. After having Morgan, everything Nebula told him about Thanos and her childhood becomes three thousand times more despicable. Tony wants nothing more than to wipe this sewage pile of a man out of existence, this demon who killed uncountable amounts of sentient beings.

The horror and confusion in Thanos’ eyes as the gauntlet makes a scraping noise instead of a perfect _snap_ is almost worth what Tony has to do next.

“And I... am Iron Man.”

Everything goes black.

Tony Stark has many regrets about his life, from his weapons dealing to his alcoholism to his other selfish habits.

But he also has Pepper.

Morgan.

The Avengers.

Rhodey.

He doesn’t regret knowing any of them, in that single blinding second, with the frozen battlefield around him, silent except for the snap of his own fingers.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, everyone.
> 
> I just wanted to let you know that I have literally no experience writing from Tony Stark's point of view, and I know that Tony Stark is kind of a favorite character to many in this fandom.
> 
> My inexperience with that may have made me write Tony in an unfair or strange way. If you think this version of Tony wasn't true to his character, let me know in a comment and I'll try to explain why I wrote him that way.
> 
> (I did write this just after seeing Far From Home months ago, though, so I might not have an answer for you. Just a fair warning).
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
